My philosophy in life is “if you have nothing nice to say to a person on their face, shut up”.I never can understand the need for people to pass comments on other people, even if in jest.
Today was the first day of the three day first-death anniversary ceremonies for my grandmother and I wore a saree for the event. For the record, I do wear saree often and not just for occasions, and I have worn saree since I was 18. However, I don’t wear it as a “Dress” up dress, I am usually casual, partly because I like being casual, but mostly because I lack the skill to “dress up”.
I wore (am wearing) a blue cotton saree, in my usual casual style – no pleats at the pallu (I never pleat the pallu), and no safety pins anywhere. Additionally, since I had to do a lot of work around the house, I tucked the free end of the pallu into my waist, as is normally done when you don’t want the pallu to get in your way. Again, this is perfectly normal, if you are used to wearing a saree on a daily basis.
The ceremonies were delayed, and by the time they were over, it was time to go to school to get the kid. I waited at the gate, as usual, for the bell to ring and the customary group of moms was chatting. This one mom, makes a beeline to me and says “what a wonderful saree, but why are you wearing it so badly – you have spoiled the beauty of the saree”.
Spoiled the beauty of the saree? Am I the only one who thinks this was rude? Or, am I, being hypersensitive to my own inadequacies (on the looks and dressing front), over-reacting to a normal sentence made perhaps in jest.
In the Hindu epic Ramayana, one of the defining traits of (Lord) Rama was supposedly “Mrudubhashana” – “of gentle words”. Mrudubhashana is my principle in life, and I hope I am able to hold on to it.