I visited a high school teacher yesterday.She was a live-wire back then, a bomb ready to explode, albeit an excellent teacher. I used to be terrified of her, and her sharp tongue, although I learned a lot academically from her. She is ill now. Very ill. I was terrified when I saw her yesterday, but for different reasons. If I had not known it was her, I wouldn’t have recognized her. I was troubled all evening yesterday.
I hear that another teacher, a favourite of mine, is also ill. Not mortally, but bed-ridden. I have promised myself that I will visit her, however much it terrifies me.
I have a work deadline today. I told my client that I am passing this one. He isn’t going to be happy, but that’s how it is. I think I overworked for three months this year, that my brain is refusing to buck up and get into it. I have another deadline in a month. I hope the brain stops its revolt soon.
I need to get my life into order again. The past week has been extremely disorganized, mostly due to inexplicable mental lethargy. I like to blame it on the heat, but that would be escapism.
While beating myself over my laziness, I made a mental list of chores that make me want to lie supine, and jobs I enjoy doing.
Cooking (oh god) and associated crap – planning, chopping vegetables, grinding spices, cleaning up, organizing fridge, organizing pantry…KMN.
Paperwork – since we moved into the new house, the files and important papers have not found a permanent home and have been disorganized. I spent two hours yesterday reorganising and managing, and realised how very much I hate the chore.
Finance – I had to meet the auditor about my tax returns yesterday. I had to drag myself by my ear to his office. It does not help that the chap who has been taking care of my papers for the past 17 years is retiring and delegating the work to his unerlings now. I hate talking to the underlings about my finance.
Social conversation – During the visit to my high school teacher’s with my friend, I was completely at a loss. I had no idea what to talk. Thankfully, my friend made up for my awkwardness. I returned exhausted, partly at the emotional distress of seeing my teacher so, and partly, at the strain of social interaction.
Teaching: A few years ago, I got back in touch with many of my high school friends. One of them, whom, funnily enough, I did not meet through social networking, but in a grocery store, tells me that the reason she passed math in high school was my coaching her. Another school friend claims I taught her Hindi, and it really helped. A third friend from college says that he passed quantum mechanics because I sat outside the examination hall at 5 AM on the morning of the exam, and rammed it into his head. I can’t remember any of this – except the last one, because I remember being appalled at how under-prepared m friend was for the exam. But as I teach my daughter every evening, I realise that their claims could be true – I seem to love teaching. After a two hour session of chemistry with the kid last night, I felt like a lot of bucks. I wondered if I should have chosen teaching as a profession, but then decided that if it became a vocation, it probably wouldn’t be as enjoyable as it has been as an avocation.
My child has her first school test today. Today could potentially decide if mommy tuition center is effective or not. Can you believe I am nervous?
Yard work: Despite the fact that it is pure evil to let me loose anywhere near plants, I love pottering about the yard. Some day, I might have a thriving garden. That would be the time I’d have given up yard work.
Writing work: although at the moment my brain is on strike, I actually like writing sciencey stuff.
Writing my thoughts: I love writing random thoughts as much as I hate voicing them to someone. But you know that, don’t you?
My mental lethargy seems to continue. I have a document to edit that has been open in my laptop for two days now. I edit a few sentences before the ennui hits and I do something else. Yeah, it’s a criminally boring document alright, but that hasn’t stopped me before. Oh well.
I am passing sharing my world this week because the questions don’t inspire me.
I read about a certain country pulling out of human rights wing of UN and the only thought that comes to my mind is a grammatically wrong phrase, largely used in said country – you got to be kidding me.