You know how the home stretch is the longest?  I have a mini home-stretch of sorts, December through February are filled with such deadlines, and there is one on 17th, for which I am done 90%, but the last 10%…ugh.

I had taken on a national-scale assignment that I completed last week.  My media work takes a break this month and would resume in January.  I had four thesis to edit, and I completed the last of them today, resolving never to take on any editing work ever again..or at least for the next six months. I like editing work – there’s something satisfying about seeing a document fall into place, but the four thesis I edited were exceptionally bad, the worst I have seen yet.  I don’t mind them being erratic in language quality– it’s my job to clean up language – but all four were written by students with no sincerity or interest – no basic punctuations, no coherence of thoughts, in fact, no understanding of what they have been doing as research.  Perhaps I am being too judgmental, mine is to merely do and not ask questions, but it bothered me considerably .  So, I am going to be more careful about the type of editing work I take up henceforth.  The good thing is that I can afford to do so now, because it seems my name is up there in the academic circles as one of the best editors (a prof I don’t know personally, recently said that he is sending his paper to Nature, but won’t submit until I take a look at it, as long as it may take for me to get to it), and as conceited as I may be about it, it’s about time I valued my worth and not take up insincere work for editing.

I can see a shift in my attitude towards selfishness these days, as can be seen from the above paragraph.  I am seriously beginning to wonder if this whole karma thing is a sham – people who have been callous, insincere and downright useless in their life end up getting everything, so where is the need for altruism, compassion, hard work and all that rot?  But like Carol said in an earlier comment, I would never be able to live with myself without my basic scruples, and I must carry on as best as I see fit, but holding on to my scruples may not, henceforth be at the expense of self-preservation.

Perhaps the above spiritual (?)/moral questions that have plagued me in the recent past had its effect, or they were merely mid-life crisis, I fell ill last week.   When I say I fell ill, I am not quite clear about about what the illness was.  I had continuous dizziness for a week, and constant nausea, but my blood pressure and sugar levels were normal.  Checked my eyesight, but that was normal too, except for some nervous weakness.  My doctor said it was probably perimenopausal vestibular migraine, but it went away once I decided not to think about karma and all that, and just do my duty.  It was most likely psychosomatic.

I attended a writing workshop today. Can writing be taught?

I have been thinking a lot about memories – a sort of meta-memory thing, but the thoughts are not consolidated enough just yet for a post.  Probably soon..

I meet my favourite blogger tomorrow.

How have things been with you ?




9 thoughts on “Updates

  1. Carol

    Definitedly, we have to follow our scruples, but equally important is listening to our hearts, and life is far too short to spend time on things that cause you distress. It’s our responsibility to be truthful and have integrity, but it’s also our responsibility to be good to ourselves.
    Enjoy your visit with your favorite blogger.


  2. shail

    //where is the need for altruism, compassion, hard work and all that rot//
    The need is ours, because we know right from wrong, good from evil. I don’t believe there is anything called karma, not in this life, not ever. I do good, I feel good. No good is ever going to come back to me because of the good I do. If at all that happens, then that’s pure coincidence. That’s what I think. 🙂
    Hope you have a good time with your blogger friend. I am waiting to read from you on ‘Can writing be taught?’ 🙂


    1. susieshy45

      Its good to do good because one feels better after doing good. Simple. Doing good is for one’w own sake, not for any benefit, near or far. But somehow I have come to believe with age that what goes around comes around.

      Liked by 1 person

  3. leendadll

    who is your favorite blogger? how did the meeting go?
    re karma: I had to learn to accept that just because I didn’t see karma play out, that didn’t mean it didn’t happen. Also, most of the people I wished to see “struck” by negative karma are living lives that I could never survive… clearly never knowing true/altruistic happiness.


    1. leendadll

      but I still hope to read of something horrible happening to the horrible person I know who won $226M. that one is just tooooo drastically out of scale for me to have been able to accept yet.



Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s